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Why Comparison?

 

 

 

 

 

 

How do we feel when someone starts comparing us like materialistic things? When someone say oh your friend is looking much gorgeous or she is smarter then you? Definitely we will try to ignore that, but at a corner of our heart we felt ourselves as incomplete and unsatisfied personality. We want to be what we are not, we start expecting much more from ourselves, even sometimes in frustration we start blaming god to for his creation, like god cannot you make me beautiful, smart, rich why you write my destiny like this, nobody loves me, likes me? We imagine ourselves as a worst creation of god but do we ever think if we will not like ourselves in the way we are who else will like us? If we start finding faults in our creation, then why we are blaming others for same act?

Actually what is comparison and why we compare? Comparison is act when two persons having similar status or designation we starts analyzing them, at every aspect and the qualities which we like, when we found in one of them we starts expecting or imaging other to be same and starts comparing them to make aware about our expectation, our likings with them.

Is it healthy to compare? Definitely I would answer, no, we are not non living things so before paying cost we should compare and then do beneficial deal, we are living human beings, our comparison can hurt anyone self respect, he can feel inferiority complex, just to prove himself he can walk on wrong path, which can ruin his whole life. Once my relative came to my place one day he starts comparing me and starts forcing me to follow the people with whom he is comparing me, for few minutes I remain quite but when I saw no end and he starts hurting my self-respect, I told him I am happy with myself, I have few qualities which make me different and unique from others which gives me identity, secondly I have brain and people who have brain, do not follow others they make their own way and only follow that way so please don’t compare me.

Comparisons leads us to unhealthy competition we never feel happy for our success we get in life, but we always feel happiness as we left people behind in race of success and become idol for others and now people would compare themselves to us.

It’s very sad sometimes we involve our kids, we compare them and wants to make them best, without thinking in this process we are killing their childhood, its very unfair to judge small kids on our expectation god blessed each child with some qualities and growth phase of each child always differs from other some starts running while others starts speaking even if they belongs from same age group. What happen if our kids start us comparing with other parents and starts imposing their wishes, expectations on us? We will get angry on them and tell them to make themselves satisfy with what they are getting, as we always think they are not mature, but what we are doing with them is fair? No, kids are only following us, their elders, so before judging them we should judge ourselves.

Comparison between human being is really unjustified, god create us different why? As he sends us to fulfill different motive. The beauty of nature lies in different, as different opinion always make difference, it introduce us with new thoughts, imaginations and ideas to make life much better and wonderful,accept this different, feel happy and complete elevate spirit of living.

Does past Matter

 

 

 

 

 

 

Does past matter? Past does not matters but past experiences always matter.  If anyone asks me about my treasure I would surely answer, past experience, which I gained by passing through lots of hurdle. It is like a platform on which our present lies. I will like to tag it as a milestone to present; it makes us a better personality isn’t it? The lessons we learn from our past, we cannot learn by any other media, it boosts our confidence about the perception we make.

Its old saying nobody came here by learning from mothers tummy, we learn after we came in this world when we face whole world without any support system and people kicks us, we learn to manage ourselves, our emotions which is very precious learning in itself.

Can we make better present without past experience? Certainly not, in our present strategies we can clearly see the reflection of our past experience. `My father always says me never forget your past, if you want to get success in present your past will gives you actual identity what you are and what you want to be? The more obstacles you faced in past, the more you are stepping footsteps towards success’. I took these golden words, now my past failure is my inspiration which makes me much more polite for the people who are in similar situation.

 Who actually decides our behavior aspects, our attitude towards situation and the people standing in front of us how much we can rely on them, are they capable to maintain our trust our faith? Will they ditch us? All answers lies in our past experiences. Our past experiences help us to understand the intentions of others in a better way and analyze them,  our reaction index towards them will based on our experience,  if our experience was good we will interact with open arms with great attachment else we will try to ignore or behave accordingly,  isn’t it ?

 Life always teaches us new definitions, new meanings. Once my father met with accident, he suffered from minor brain hem rage, we admitted him and our relative who is living nearby without informing us, without thinking about my father’s condition, even after doctors suggestion, ‘you can’t manage him at home’ he took discharge. At home his condition become worst when we talked to him about this, besides realizing his mistake he starts blaming and cursing us and wants appreciation for what he did till that time. My father’s always rely on him but what a big shame? This time a new lesson for life is waiting for us we learn a lesson to differentiate between people as well as we learn the new definition of relationship, relations are not those which we get from our birth but relations are those which we make ourselves and maintain it by selfless by our soul.

Can u tell me why we worried about our kids when they are in growing age? Definitely, as we know the learning and experience of these years have a great influence on the rest of their lives.  This can groom them and mould them in great personality.

If we will analyze, our present, is result of our past activities what we did in past with lots of worthy learning, which plays true role of our friend in the time of need, it enlighten our path,  like a small amount of light which becomes a pathfinder for better today. If the problem does lie in the past, it is remarkably resistant to present life cures. This is because life is trying to force us to remember, what we need to know now by facing the wounds of the past. Our learning becomes our experience and experience makes us more mature.

 

 

Destruction when this word clicks, what is our reaction? Generally people declared destruction as bad, worst or disaster but is it fair to think like this? When it comes to human being a person who rebels or opposes the rules of society he is living in, people tagged him as a destructive mind but do we ever think without destruction, what is the importance of construction? It is our human nature we always like positive, good but we forget good is good just because of bad, if we will not face rough phases in life we can never understand how good is meaningful to us, to our life.

My father generally says me ‘analyze destruction’, you will find, seeds of construction lies in the root of destruction, I asked him how?  today I came to know what he wants to say, when my daughter was breaking her toys and my hubby said ‘she is destructive’, once I was disappointed but when I look at her she was staring each and every part of toy by touching that, it seems that she is trying to explore something new for her, instead of getting angry I become happy and start helping her by telling her about different parts. It is just like potter who dig the sand patted it to make it soft and then mould in desired shape, digging and petting is like destruction but end result which came to us is constructive.

 Actually destruction is nothing, it is only our attitude, how we look at a situation, how we think, the things which are destructive to us may be constructive for others. once someone tagged me as current wire, I was shocked and feel shattered but suddenly a new thought came in my mind, if I am current wire, then we can use current in different ways in our life, to make life better and in present scenario can we expect our life without current? Certainly not and at other hand it is destructive only when we touch openly or use it carelessly. This is our fault isn’t it?

 Anyone would tell me why we adopt new things and discard old ones in our life? Correct as we want everything latest, want to make our life easy and comfortable by using them, in the same way if we change old thoughts according to generation, if we like to change old rituals in new way where we can enjoy them accept and follow them with open heart, it doesn’t mean we are having destructive thoughts it means we are reconstructing ourselves according the desire of new age.

So from next time if someone calls you rebellion then take it as compliment think why he is criticizing you, your views? Yes at some level your thinking is affecting his views his mental state, that’s why he is opposing you and hesitating to accept your opinion. If end result is fruitful then one day he will understand your way of thinking and accept that also don’t disappoint yourself.

 Actually while judging about destructive and constructive only our own perception works, it is like a glass which is filled half by water how we assess that half empty or half full. Destruction and Construction are like two sides of single coin, if we look at sunny side then by our intelligence, our wisdom we can convert destruction into construction, as, the voyage of discovery is not in seeking new landscapes but in having new eyes’ isn’t ?

 

Where Stress Free Life Lies

 

     

 

Why you are taking stress? Stress is not good for your health. You are lean as you take too much of stress we generally hear these statements but do we ever think about stress where it lies and from where it comes and occupy our mind, it is like uninvited and unwanted guest sometimes we become so frustrated, lose our peace, we blast out and become violent isn’t it?

 Actually stress is nothing it is a state of our mind when we regularly think about any topic or issue we generally starts to analyze that, about its good and bad effect on our life and we also predict what would happen like, if this or that will take place, what people will say how they will react, we starts living our life in future and unfortunately if the worst scenario we predicted comes true then faith on predictions become stronger, more and more we deeply think about that issue, lastly that issue become stress for us.

 It happens in everybody life we can say it is part and parcel of our life. When we expect something positive make strategies even take some steps accordingly and suddenly things went wrong then what will happen? Very true we become upset, for a positive expectation now we have to face a negative phase which is really unfair and unreasonable, we feel shattered and start blaming on others, our situation is like neither we can digest nor can we spit out.

 Is it fair just because of stress scare, we won’t enjoy our life’s small moments which fills us with positive energy, we won’t dream? I would answer never as a small positive energy spreads positive vibes in environment, that kills negativity where we can think positively, seeks for a better option before things go away from our hands, if we can put control on situation at some level then this positive energy will help to enlighten our humor and we can convert our worst to best,  as if one way has been blocked another ten options are waiting for us only we have to identify correct milestone for our success. Let’s fly with our dream with open eyes and actual potential.

Are We Original

                                                    

                                                      

                                                         

                                                   

                                         

                              
Once I was teaching my child about social behavior, suddenly a thought came in my mind are we original? You also asked this question many times like me, when you look at your image in mirror. Each and every one of us has two faces, one for society in which we are living and one for ourselves, who we are.

 My sister asked me a question, why kids look so innocent? I answered as they are original from soul, they never hide what they want to show, means they are very much expressive about emotions they do not care about what people might think. If they want to cry they cry, they are happy they laughs loudly, even if they are scared they never hide they will hug us tightly, that’s why they look so peaceful… happy, After giving her reply I asked myself can we do it.

 If we want to cry we don’t, as a person who cries is declared as weak personality in society, if we want to laugh loudly and openly we cannot as it is not considered as a good manners , if we scared we don’t want to show that, infect we always show we are strong and bold why? Exactly as we don’t want to give chance to people, to crack joke on us or laugh at us.

Nature blessed us with few but unique qualities, which make us original but Are we able to maintain those qualities? After leaving childhood, we grew up and left those qualities or manipulate them according our desire to fulfill our motive. sometimes we become politicians who do politics ‘divide and rule’ and become diplomatic to achieve our goal, sometimes we become good manipulator who manipulates all principals to make situation according own desire, to take lead over people. Our policy become ‘by hook or crook’ we become so self-centered that we start to cheat people and pull them away from the race of success to confirm our success. We ourselves create such scenario and put blame on others why? Very true, as we do not want to ruin our image, our position in society.

Why we are walking along with two faces? Only because we are possessive about society, never, actually we don’t want to come out from our pre-occupied self image of innocent personality, we don’t want to feel shame on ourselves that’s why we always try to justify ourselves, in that process we kill our conscience. In short we are afraid to face ourselves, we don’t have answer of our deeds do we?

What we counts really counts.

 

                                                                                      

  

                                                                

How do you feel when somebody pass you a comment, misbehaves with you, ignores you, talk rudely? Definitely you will feel shatter, restless or low, one can tolerate any inadvertent mistake but not disrespect. Respect is very sensitive issue related to our life just like food is necessary for our body to survive; respect is nourishment of our soul nobody can live without it. Sometimes we use to fight over it at the extreme level isn’t it?

If somebody asks me who is biggest relationship destroyer? I would definitely answer disrespect, whenever we see a person who disrespects us, our blood starts boiling and we lose your mental peace, and temper isn’t it. If he apologies then also its very difficult for us to forgive. This emotional pain cannot heal by word sorry, as sorry is only an ointment which can heal wound but cannot remove scars. Sorry cannot heal dent driven on heart. We have to depend on time to heal.

What is the greatest gift we can give someone, which is valuable and nobody will hesitate to accept? Exactly respect, if we want to make someone happy show genuine respect towards him.  Remember there is great difference between genuine and superficial respect. Genuine respect comes directly from soul and superficial related to power and position and increase proportionately.      

This gift we must give to ourselves, self respect, it is much more worthy then other materialistic things in life. Self respect means; what is our worth for ourselves. We all have some qualities in our nature and principals made by us on which life runs smoothly, who make us unique and give us identity, we should respect those qualities. Self respect not only boosts our confidence but motivates us to take new challenges in life so that we can touch new heights. Self respect gives birth to self image and strong self image gives birth to success.

If we want to progress in our life, count respect, remember when we were kids, we respect our teachers why? Why don’t we argue with them? Why we accept their guidance? Can you answer these questions? I can, if we want to grasp knowledge provided by them, like to implement them in various situations and fields of life, then we have to follow their teachings without resistance, it make learning enjoyable.

Respect is basic foundation of feelings like trust, faith, love, truth and peace without respect they are like only words without sense everyone needs respect; it is the greatest source of joy and pleasure it develops potential in our personality, respect gives us reason to live and meaning to life isn’t ?

 

 

 

 

 

Where Is Happiness

 

Happiness, everyone is seeking for happiness , One day when my hubby asked me when and where is happiness? I told him don’t think too much and be happy. I left this question unanswered, but I raised this puzzle to myself where happiness lies, in memories, in thoughts, in success, in expectations, in luxuries or in future which is mystery in itself and is it as easy to follow ‘don’t worry’ as I advised him?  

When somebody hurts us can we easily forget that? physical pain can be cured by taking medicines but there is no remedy to cure pain touched to our soul, it only fills our life with sorrow and complaints we feel ourselves shattered isn’t it ? When it happened to me someone gave me medicine of happiness she asked me… a person that hurts you is more important than your smile, your peace? she asked me about his importance and existence in my priorities, when I answered I don’t like that person at all than she told me then why you are worried about him and his comments ignore him don’t answer or entertain him. It was difficult for me but I follow and now I am happy. as after that, I become neutral for him I have no feelings good or bad for him.

Sometimes when we have nothing then also we feel ourselves happy but sometimes we have everything we expected with us, to enjoy but we are not happy why? We are running behind success in that race we earn name, money, prosperity but we are losing happiness, soul satisfaction, remember a day when your heart start dancing without any music only on rhythm of your heart beat we will fail to find that .

 Actually happiness owes happiness, small moments of happiness are scattered around us but we are refusing to accept those, because of our desire to get more and more, for bigger we use to lose that small once, But when we get that bigger one for which we were waiting for long we cannot enjoy that also, as only we know what compromises and adjustments we made to earn that moment.

 More time we spend in future planning rather than enjoying present perception behind that is future planning is necessary for leading beautiful and peaceful life but people who have such great thought can answer me only one question do they know what will happen tomorrow or in coming minute?  No one can predict future then why we all take stress for that, Why don’t we live our present moment like it is last moment of our life to enjoy. Some people gave me comment oh! You are still a kid when you will get older? I replied, I am old by physic but still want to be kid by soul I don’t want to leave my childhood because I want to do fun I want to express my true feelings without being possessive about people living around me I don’t want to be idol for anyone but I want to admire beautiful gift given by god, “my life”. It seems I am little bit selfish here but  if I can’t satisfy my soul, I can’t admire my life, how can I satisfy others, if I am not happy then how can I make others happy.  

Life is like sand nobody can collect that in hand, each and every day it is going to be lesser. One day strong wind will come and take life along with, it’s better to complete the picture with happy “The End” where not only mind and body lives peacefully but soul get competent with a belief, god always gives us according to our potential he send us in full package of completeness to fulfill an aim given by him, which we have to complete in our life time.  

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